Melancholic State
by LitLover 101
Summary: Written for a challenge created by Rune Saint. He lost his brother. She lost her baby. He flipped his switch. She's clinging to the remains of her sanity. Can Stefan and Hayley find a way to solace in each other or will they destroy everyone else in their path?
1. Chapter 1

Written for a challenge created by Rune Saint. He lost his brother. She lost her baby. He flipped his switch. She's clinging to the remains of her sanity. Can Stefan and Hayley find a way to solace in each other or will they destroy everyone else in their path?

**Disclaimer: I do not own The Vampire Diaries TV show. That honor goes to Julie Plec and Kevin Williamson. **

**Hello, my lovely readers. This is the first time that I've written for a challenge but I like to play with pairings. Here is the product of such an adventure. On with the show… **

Chapter 1: "You're Switch is Fried!"

Stefan found it all so funny now. At the time it had felt like he had been dragged straight into the depths of hell itself but he was wrong because at least in hell people don't expect you to do the right thing. They don't call. Or write. Or give a damn when you walk away…

**Five Days Ago: **

Sitting on the bench it felt like forever since he had come back from the crumbling Other Side. Caroline had been holding him for longer than he could concentrate. Every once in a while she would say something that was meant to be comforting as he stared at the ground in utter and complete shock. His brother was dead. Not dead vampire dead. Not dead to him because he was Damon and had done something else that made him the world's biggest dick as Jeremy Gilbert would say but dead. Not coming back to torture him about his taste in food or his "over" use of hair product. Damon was dead. Not coming back dead. Like their parents dead. Not to return. No epic good-bye scene for Stefan. Nope. Just gone. Infinitely gone.

Getting up, Stefan said that he needed to go. Caroline had asked him where he was going but he said he would be back. Don't worry. He just needed to take a walk to clear his head. Giving Caroline a reassuring smile, he gave her a hug and then began to walk. He couldn't go home. There was no home to go to even if he could go back to Mystic Falls because home was Damon. Damon was home. Without Damon there was no family and that meant nowhere to go and nothing to do.

"Where you goin,' Stef?" Damon's voice called as Stefan headed toward the nearest road. He stepped into the street and laid down, contemplating the night sky. Why had he never done this before? Damon used to do it all the time? As it turned it out it wasn't so bad, lying in the road, watching the sky above, waiting. "Stef?" Damon called with one of his eye rolling, extended, overly dramatic sighs that would ordinarily cause Stefan's mouth to quirk upward, but not now. Not when he knew that his brother was gone.

"Uh oh," Damon said as head lights headed toward Stefan who's head turned slowly toward the light. He didn't feel anything as the car came toward him and then he felt its tires rolling over his body. For a moment there was agonizing pain that reminded him that he was still alive. And that's all he wanted. Well, that and to have Damon back. But he couldn't have the latter so why not have the former?

When Stefan heard the car stop. The sound of heavy breathing and a pounding heart came closer. Stefan got to his feet. Slowly. Don't want to scare his new play mate. Feeling his lips quirk at his thoughts, Stefan stared at the young woman who had withdrawn her cell and was furiously punching at the numbers. There were tears in her eyes. She was shaking badly. Poor girl. She was probably thinking that she had killed some poor, innocent soul. It was important to Stefan that he correct her. And soon. "Hi," he called with a disarming smile.

The girl's head snapped up and her jaw dropped. "Oh! Oh, my God. But you're… I… How?"

"How? Why? People are always asking all these questions. Sometimes we think there's an answer for everything. But really there's absolutely nothing," Stefan said with a slow shake of his head. "If only we knew that in the beginning then we might not waste so much time giving a damn."

"Um… Are you okay?" the girl asked with wide eyes as she swallowed heavily. Her heart was pounding furiously and her cheeks were flushed from fear and a wonderful shot of adrenaline. It would make blood all that sweeter. He missed a good chase. Would she run? "I should call an ambulance. You might have hit your head," the girl was saying as she stared at Stefan. Trying to contain the situation. Trying to not show that she was terrified. But her hands were shaking and she dropped the phone to the ground.

Reaching down to grab her phone the girl came face to face with Stefan as he crouched down so they were a mere inch apart. "What's your name?" Stefan asked huskily, staring into her eyes so she had to answer.

"Mandy," she replied with a gulp. "My name… is Mandy."

"Hello, Mandy. I'm Stefan," Stefan replied with another smile as Mandy forced herself to smile in return. "You know, Mandy, I am having a really bad night. My brother, Damon, he decided to take my role and play the hero. Then he died. He died to save me, our town and all of our friends. Isn't that terrible, Mandy?"

"That's really terrible," Mandy told Stefan as she stared back at him, crying quietly. "I can't move."

"Huh. Let's fix that. Would you like for that to happen, Mandy?" Stefan inquired. nodding as Mandy's head moved up and down. "Yeah. I thought so. Mandy," Stefan began, placing his hands on her shoulders. "Are your car keys still in your ignition?" Mandy shook her head. "Can you give them to me?" She pulled them from her jeans pocket and handed them over. "Thank you, Mandy. You can run now," Stefan said, gently before letting go of her shoulders.

Watching Mandy run for the count of thirty, Stefan began to whistle. It reminded him of Enzo and for some reason the thought of the vampire who had tried to kill him countless times did not bother him. Nothing really bothered him right now. Not yet. Maybe later. When he had hit thirty, Stefan shot in front of Mandy and came to stand before her. Mandy. as many people in this situation would. screamed until Stefan sank his teeth into her neck. Sucking more and more deeply, Stefan felt better as the blood flowed down his throat.

"Flipped the switch again, did ya?" Damon inquired as Stefan dropped Mandy's body to the ground. Cocking his head to the side, Stefan shook his head.

"Nope. Not yet. Sorry to disappoint you, Damon. I'm not that far gone yet," Stefan replied as he twirled Mandy's keys along his index finger.

"Keep telling yourself that," Damon called after Stefan as Stefan whistled to the tune in his head. Stopping beside Mandy's car, Stefan climbed inside and placed the key in the ignition. The next time he picked a victim he would have to make sure that he picked someone with a more interesting vehicle. This was like some kind of mommy mobile that Mandy had probably borrowed from her mommy. He should feel bad about having taken young Mandy from her family too soon but no one cared that his brother was gone. But Damon was a serial killer. Maybe no one should care. Except for Elena and Alaric and Liz and Caroline.

Maybe Stefan should turn the car around. However, he had no idea what he would do if he turned back. Would he be able to watch Elena fall apart? Could he stand to see Alaric back from the dead and not silently ask himself why Ric and not Damon? And Caroline? She would start trying to find a way to bring them back when there was no way and Stefan could listen to her constant stream of chirpy chatter about how they would find a way. At some point he would snap at her that this was not the damn football team that she was cheering for. This was his damn brother. This was Damon who had not been able to forsee living eternity without. No, he couldn't turn back. There was nothing left for him at home. Or not home.

The question was where, where was he supposed to go? Stefan had been all over the United States, parts of Canada and most of Europe among others. There was nowhere in particular that he wanted to go and no one that he really wanted to be around. The idea of going where no one would know his name appealed to his senses. He could give people a new name and start over. Pretend to be a human without trying to enter a girl, who looked like his ex's, life. Things would be simpler this time. Cleaner. No drama.

Turning on the stereo, Stefan turned up the music to full blast. Driving to a service station, he filled the tank, compelled the attendant that he had paid and grabbed a couple of bottles of really horrible bourbon and a case of beer. What was fun about being a vampire if you couldn't drink and drive? If he was lucky he would run into a van full of teens doing the same thing, have dinner since all that Mandy had achieved was making him feel like he was starving. Taking a swig from his first bottle, Stefan removed his hands from the wheel and began to laugh as the car swerved. Maybe he would lucky, get in an accident, be thrown from the car and be beheaded.

Laughing hysterically at the thought, Stefan noticed that there was a car pulled off to the side of the road up ahead. Smiling, he pulled up beside it. Getting out, he looked around for the passengers. "Hello? Anybody need help?" he called, trying not to laugh at his fake concern.

"Help. Over here. We need help," a woman's voice called and Stefan smiled when he noticed that they were standing off to the side of the road. There was a woman who was probably in her thirties with a man who was about her age. "My husband swerved to avoid a deer. We've been waiting for help for an hour," the woman said, as she looked at her husband who was holding a shirt to a head wound.

"That's a real pity," Stefan murmured as he sniffed the blood while moving closer to the couple. When he was close enough for the woman to get a good look at him she let out a loud scream before taking off, running. Looking at the man who frowned while watching his wife run away, Stefan shook his head in sympathy. "And they wonder why the divorce rate is so high. Be back in a minute."

Chasing the woman down, Stefan made quick work of her before he came back to make quick work of her husband. Back to the car and on with the road trip. With each new victim Stefan felt his hold on his humanity beginning to slip. And part of him could care less. "Stef, your switch is gone. You flip it off and on one too many times. It's not a toy." Damon waggled his finger and Stefan grinned.

"Fuck off, Damon," Stefan replied with another sip from a bottle of beer, he really felt nothing.

At some point he must have stopped somewhere, Stefan discovered when he woke up with a dark haired woman he had never met before. She was dead. Getting up, Stefan grabbed his clothes, dressed and then walked out the door. None of it meant a thing. There was nothing that meant a thing to him anymore.

Exiting the hotel room, Stefan walked down toward the stairs. Running down the stairs, he climbed on the back of the motorcycle that had once belonged to a biker. But then again so did his tongue. Among other parts. But when he pissed Stefan off by knocking his beer over and didn't apologize during day three of Stefan's trip, he had to teach the man a lesson. Unfortunately he didn't last more than an hour. Too bad. Stefan had been having fun.

After ditching the motorcycle on the edge of New Orleans, Stefan felt pleased when he stepped over the border of the town. He could not wait to run into Klaus. He wondered if Rebekah was still around. Last time he heard about the two Originals Caroline was telling him about her sex life. It didn't take Stefan long before he was greeted by a pack of wolves. This was going to be fun.

Ten minutes later, covered in blood and with a nasty bite, Stefan was more annoyed than amused as he struggled toward the area that the last wolf had told him that the Mikaelsons lived in before he ripped his head off. Stepping toward the gate, he saw the back of a familiar head. The woman looked like he felt, like she was full of unspent rage and no matter how much she tried to expel it it was still there. "Hayley?" Stefan called weakly as the werewolf turned to stare at him with a confused and irritated look. "Little help."

"Who…" Hayley began when she seemed to recognize him. Then she recognized the smell on him. "You're covered in wolf blood," she snarled and then she had him by the throat. She was incredibly strong. Too strong. That wasn't possible.

"Hayley, put the vampire down," a calm voice called but Hayley ignored it. "Hayley," came the warning tone and Stefan grinned when Hayley dropped him on his ass.

"Elijah, how good of you to show up. Mind telling Klaus that I need some blood?" Stefan inquired with a wide grin.

Elijah peered at Stefan with a questioning look and sniffed the air. "Mr. Salvatore. I'm not sure you understand what you have just entered into."

"Then why don't you explain it to me while Klaus gives me some blood," Stefan replied as he pushed himself to his feet and Elijah came over to help him.

"You're going to help him?" Hayley yelled with a look of rage directed at Elijah.

"Yes. He's one of my people, Hayley," Elijah snapped as the wolf or hybrid glared back at him.

"Unbelievable," Hayley growled.

"See you around, wolf girl," Stefan called as Hayley sneered while Elijah half carried him into the house. When they found Klaus who was drinking Stefan called. "Hello, Nik."

Klaus turned around, his eyes widened when he took in the sight of Stefan who looked like his old friend from so long ago. "Ripper?"

"You called," Stefan quipped as Klaus came forward to embrace him. "Can I get a drink?" he asked when Klaus chuckled.

"What have you gotten yourself up to and what brings you to town? Nothing to do with that fool of a brother of yours?" Klaus inquired as he poured out a drink and then opened his wrist.

"The fool is dead," Stefan announced with a shrug.

"Damon is dead?" Elijah looked at Klaus who frowned as well.

Stefan ignored their looks. "What's up with the wolf girl? Is she like a pet that you're keeping around of something?" he asked as Klaus gave Elijah another long look. Thinking about the look on Hayley's face, Stefan thought about what he could do to irritate her again. That look was worth it. Something about it made him feel like they were kindred spirits and just because he didn't feel anything right now didn't mean he wanted to feel nothing alone.

**Comments, questions or requests, leave them in the little review box. **

**Thank you for faving, following, reading and/or reviewing. **

**Peace, **

**Jessica**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello, my lovely readers. This took a little bit longer than I thought it would take to write. Thanks, writer's block. Anywho, let me know what you think of the chapter. On with the show…**

Chapter 2: The Wreckage that is My Life

Hayley lost her baby and now she was certain that she was losing the last remnants of her sanity. Of course, nothing could compare to the insanity that ran rampant about the compound. Klaus didn't really do anything but drink and sit in his room staring at his blank canvasses. It's like she ever thought that his work didn't suck it was just that he wasn't doing anything. She could not understand why he wasn't out there ripping through the remaining fools who caused them to have to send their baby away. What kind of father was he? Didn't he care? All he could do was try to save his own sorry skin thanks to the damned Guereras and their damned moonlight rings.

What made her even angrier was freakin' Elijah. He was even worse than Klaus. What excuse did he have for not doing his utmost to put every last one of the witches and wolves that had any part in her losing her daughter? What happened to the guy who said he would "Always protect her?" What a load of crap. He couldn't even look at her the same. All he saw was a monster, similar to his brother, only not blood. She no longer was what he wanted, what he had believed her to be… The last straw was when he had defended the vampire, one of the idiotic Salvatore brothers who had the nerve to kill some of her people. Yes, the werewolves were having a problem but that was for her to settle, not for some fool to come in and to slaughter.

Walking down the streets of New Orleans, Hayley wished that someone would challenge her. Just one idiot with a death wish would do for her tonight. She just needed to make this ache in her chest subside by ripping someone's throat out. "Come on," she whispered under her breathe, her eyes searching the darkness. She knew there would be a fight tonight. There was always a fight breaking out since Francesca had taken the city for her own. The problem with power was that once you had it you came to find out that there was always someone else who wanted to take it from you. Hayley did not envy the other werewolf, she just wanted her dead.

"You shouldn't be so far away from home, vampire," a voice snarled about five feet away.

Smiling to herself, Hayley turned around on the balls of her feet and spread her arms out in a manner that she had seen from Klaus. Yes, it was a little bit melodramatic but at that moment she didn't care. She just wanted to rip the other wolf's head off. If he wasn't with her, then he was against her and she was beyond negotiating with anyone. Save that for Elijah and his peace treaties. It hadn't saved her life when the witch slit her throat. She was done with trying to help people. This wolf made his choice, let him die with it.

Moving forward with her fists clenched, Hayley was about to punch the wolf in the face when he hit the ground, face first. "Didn't anyone ever teach you to not pick on women?" a familiar voice that set Hayley's teeth on edge rang through the air. "Not that I object to that behavior. I tend to pick on whoever smells the most like fear, actually. And right now, you smell delicious. So, what do you say since I'm trying to make friends here and all, you won't mind if I take a quick bite?" Stefan asked before sinking his fangs into the wolf's neck who let out a strangled scream. Retracting his fangs, Stefan grimaced, "On the other hand since you taste kind of gross I think I'll let the lady finish you off."

Yanking the wolf to his feet, Stefan moved to hand him to Hayley who grimaced and took a step back. "No, thank you. I'm not big on others' leftovers," she snapped before moving to turn her back on Stefan.

The older vampire shrugged, taking the werewolf by the chin, he forced the man to meet his eyes. "You know I don't think that she's feeling that you're a very good peace offering, do you?" Shaking the wolf's head back and forth as his own head moved there was snap before the wolf's body dropped to the ground. "Well, that was a waste. Okay, so where are we going now?" he asked with a clap of his hands and a wide grin.

"We?" Hayley shook her head. "You're kidding right?" Turning her back on Stefan, she started to stride away only to find him walking along beside her. "What do you think you're doing?" she yelled, stopping and turning to find Stefan's face an inch from hers which was even more disconcerting.

"I'm. Trying. To. Be. Your. Friend," Stefan said with a cocky smile that only caused Hayley to feel the urge to knock his teeth out. What in the hell was his problem?

"You want to be my friend?" Hayley asked incredulously with wide eyes. "What in God's name would tell you that I need a friend?" The very idea that she would want to be friends with any of the idiots that ran around Mystic Falls, now more than ever, was the most ridiculous idea that she ever heard in her life.

Shaking his head with a chuckle, Stefan looked around. "Well, I guess I'll have to work on that one. How about I say that I need a friend since I'm new to this city and that I need to be able to get around with my head still intact. Survival thing. If I recall correctly, it's supposed to be some kind of instinct or something."

"Whatever," Hayley grumbled, giving Stefan another glare for good measure. "Just don't get in my way. And do not kill anyone who I tell you not kill or you'll have me to deal with."

"You know that I killed a whole bunch of Klaus' hybrids back in Mystic Falls, right? So, you're threatening me, not really frightening," Stefan explained with a smug smile as he fell into step with Hayley. She was already regretting not telling him to go to hell or at least trying to kill him. Who cares if Klaus liked him? He could find a new friend or whatever Stefan was to him. More like a lackey and it wasn't like Klaus was in short supply of people who would do his bidding once the Francesca problem was dealt with.

When she couldn't stand the silence of the sound of Stefan's tuneless whistling anymore, Hayley broke down and spoke. "You know that you're not exactly building a case for yourself?"

"You mean with the whole making it clear that if I wanted to kill you at any time you wouldn't stand a chance?" Stefan quipped lightly. "I know."

"What exactly is wrong with you? I heard you were one of the white hats?" Hayley growled, stopping and turning to look Stefan in the eye with her arms folded over her chest.

Stefan's expression darkened for a moment as he looked around him. "Dead brother. That's what happened to me. I would ask how you got turned into a hybrid but I don't really care… about anything really." Kicking at a spot on the ground, Stefan sighed. "Is there anywhere that we could get a drink at?"

"Yeah, Rousseau's, but they're closed," Hayley retorted with a sigh. She could go for a drink, or a thousand considering how shitty the day was turning out to be. And if she was going to have to deal with Stefan and his pain along with her own then she might as well do it while not knowing her own damned name.

Stefan shook his head with another chuckle. Hayley frowned, not understanding what it was that he found to be so funny. "And a bar being closed is stopping you why? You're a vampire now, Hayley, you've got to think outside the box. Man, what have Klaus and Elijah been teaching you? You think that if someone was going to turn you they'd at least take the time to train you. Not that my sire did. Nope, Katherine had more important things to do like saving her own skin."

"Klaus didn't turn me," Hayley offered. Why she told Stefan anything was beyond her. She did not like him. She did not trust him. And if she told him anything about Hope then she would be putting her child into danger. But since it wasn't exactly a secret that she had a hybrid baby she figured that someone would offer up the info sooner or later.

"Huh? So, you just magically turned into a vampire?" Stefan called over his shoulder as he moved faster toward the quarter. He seemed intent on getting to a bar for some reason.

"No, it's a long story. Maybe I'll tell you what happened after I have a beer," Hayley said when she caught a familiar smell in the air. Feeling her irritation building, Hayley caught sight of Camille who was just stepping out. "Stef-" Hayley couldn't finish her reproach because Stefan was already speeding toward the human. "Damn it," Hayley muttered under her breath. Why couldn't anyone just not do stupid things like try to kill people she knew?

Feeling frustrated Hayley sped after Stefan who was reaching for Cami's neck. "Stop now, Stefan," Hayley called under her breath hoping that Cami wouldn't hear her and freak out. If the human had no idea what was going on she might not run and cause the vampire to chase her. If she did and Stefan caught up before Hayley… well, Hayley didn't want to think that far ahead.

"Why? She's food." Stefan grunted as he wrapped his fingers around Cami's neck and whirled her around to face Hayley who felt her fangs descend. "I just can't stop feeding."

Hayley tried to think of something that might stop Stefan other than knocking him out cold. "She's Klaus' friend. You know how he feels about people doing things to what he thinks is his," Hayley reasoned as Cami stood utterly still, her eyes huge. 'At least she's not putting up a fight,' Hayley was thinking as Stefan rolled his eyes.

"And I care why? I can find somewhere else to live during my time here. Besides I just don't see Klaus as "Being Friends with Humans" type, do you?"

"You're wrong. I'm…" Camille began. "Well, it's less like a friendship and more like he tells me all of his pain because I'm a therapist. Maybe we could work together, too? If there's anything you would possibly want to talk about?"

Sighing heavily, Stefan placed his head on Cami's shoulder waiting until she inclined her head to meet his eyes. "Yeah. I've got loads of material for a good therapy session. Or in this case about a thousand. But you see the problem is that I don't want to talk about my pain… All I want from you is to drain you until you head hits the ground and I go find something more entertaining than the sound of your voice." Finishing his speech, Stefan sank his fangs into Cami's neck who screamed.

Hayley cursed under her breath before speeding toward Stefan who threw her off when he tossed Cami at her. "What is wrong with you?" the hybrid snarled at the vampire who wiped his mouth.

"Needed to get that after taste of wolf out of my mouth," Stefan replied with a smile as he rocked on his heels. "Now, how about you," he nodded at Cami who was pressing her hand to her neck wound, "reopen the bar so that we can have a drink."

"Why don't you go to hell?" Cami snarled back.

"Ah, come on? I barely drained an artery. It can't be that bad? You live in a town full of vampires. There's no way that was the first time that someone fed from you. So just be a nice, little human, and let us in. That way I don't have to do anything like draining another artery 'cause you really kind of upset me with the whole wanting to talk to me about my pain. I'm a really private person," Stefan told Cami with his head cocked, tapping his chin. "Or was it that I ate a private person? Do you think that after you eat someone that you'll have their thoughts? That would be freaky, am I right?"

"Who is this guy?" Cami whispered to Hayley as she withdrew a ring of keys with a shaking hand.

"Trust me, you don't want to know," Hayley replied sincerely.

"I heard that," Stefan called from right behind Hayley who turned around and punched him in the nose.

"Ow. That hurt. Damn!" Stefan placed his hand to his nose, moving it back into proper position with a sickening crack as Cami opened the door to the bar. "And we're in. Thank you so much. What's you name again?"

"You didn't ask for it the first time," Cami snapped drily as she made her way behind the bar top.

Striding across the bar, Stefan pulled out a stool and stood to the side, waiting for Hayley to sit down. She ignored him and headed further down the bar and took a different seat. This did not seem to bother Stefan as he came to sit down beside her. Directing his gaze toward Cami, who was pulling out three shot glasses and setting them on the bar top he started in again, "Let me guess what your name is… Jenny?"

Cami rolled her eyes as she poured a shot and downed it before pouring one for Hayley and then one for Stefan, "Try again."

"Susie?" Stefan said which caused Hayley to laugh. "Okay not Susie. How 'bout Lily?"

Refilling the three glasses, Cami leaned against the back of the bar as far out of reach from Stefan as she could get. "You're incredibly bad at this game."

"Yeah, well, I've got to do something to kill time," Stefan replied with a roll of his eyes and a smile. "Let me see. You look like one of those women that should be on Friends. Phoebe? Rachel? Monica?"

After Stefan guessed the wrong name for the fiftieth time they decided to make it a drinking game. After the sixtieth wrong answer they started to try to rename each other. That's how Stefan found out what Cami's real name was when he tried to rename her Carrie and she told him. "No, it's Cami." This caused all three to start laughing like this was the funniest thing they had ever heard.

"Okay, so we need to find our Friends names," Cami enthused. "Okay, so I think that Stefan will have to be Chandler if Chandler were a psycho vampire. And, Hayley, you're, ummm, Rachel."

"How am I Rachel?" Hayley inquired.

"Well, you're not Monica because you're not that much of a control freak. So that means that Klaus is Monica," Cami told them and that was as far as they got because Stefan and Hayley kept saying that Klaus was Monica, followed by hysterical laughter and taking more shots. The three were found the next morning with Hayley lying across the bar top. Stefan asleep on his stool and Cami behind the bar, snoring.

**Thank you to everyone who has read, faved, followed and/or reviewed. **

**Answers to review questions: **

**Guest: There will be much more to this story because this was kind of a "lost summer" of what could have happened if Stefan had come to NOLA on his own and it's thanks to Rune Saint's challenge. **

**Guest: Thank you and I will. **

**Aria Daughter of Chaos: I will, I promise. **

**Lea: Merci. **

**Guest: Oui. **

**Peace, **

**Jessica**


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